Connections In-tact

The whole of May I was traveling and had it not been to the places I love, it would have been a tedious trip. Never stayed in a place for more than 2 days and the trip covered Chennai, Madurai, Coimbatore, Pollachi, Palghat, Palani and Kodaikanal. So many times, I have traversed these places, but the pleasure of spending some time with the relatives, friends and their family has not diminished in anyway. It was yet another memorable trip, wishing the newly married, blessing the newly born, blessed by those awaiting death, congratulating those who have cleared their exams with flying colours, consoling those who have failed to pass through these stupid exams and most importantly fed heavily by whoever I visited. As for me, these trips fill me with love and happiness as a lamp is filled with light and warmth and is a way to cherish the past and be connected with it always. The past as majestic as the mountains, though irrelevant and obsolete, lets the present flow through it, unless we build a barrier to stagnate and stop it.

I had a view of the Coimbatore Junction from a roof-top and the all that I could see are the coarsely illuminated hoardings of all the telecom operators. A substantial evidence that, India has turned into a huge market for the mobile operators. It is no longer the city I have known and loved.

It was a very brief stay at Kodaikanal, only a couple of hours, during which time, I managed to visit Mark and Graces as I wanted wish Grace personally on her 100th birthday anniversary. I have written many posts on Mark Antrobus, because he has been and is being a great inspiration to me in certain aspects.

Outlook has published an article on Grace in its recent issue. I am sure you will enjoy reading this article - Amazing Grace

A Blessing

This is a tag called the blessing tag. I was blessed and tagged by Dawn. The idea behind this is to pray for and bless 3 blog friends and this tag propagates across the blog world taking many forms and blessing many people. Interesting and worth doing.

As this from Dawn, the blessing has to be a quote from someone. Let me quote this poem to bless my blog friends who recently brought in new life into this mother earth.

Anand, Bharath and Kamal - their cute little ones Dishita, Arjuun and Krrish are blessed.

The next part of the tag is to eloborate our view on the following 10 points

1. It is important to be liked by others
2. Obedience is a virtue
3. People are not malicious but they become so because of bad experiences or circumstances
4. Education broadens our view and makes people more humane
5. People who have no money troubles are happier
6. As people get older they get wiser
7. You can live on love and fresh air
8. There is a celestial guardian angel looking after each one of us
9. All living beings reincarnate
10. Heaven and Hell are places you go to after death

Dawn has done a faboulous work eloborating these points and saved me from thinking hard on this:). If you have not read this post, please do it now. Greats quotes and insight. Good topics for a debating competition as well - make yourself a Great Debator!!!

Grace turns 100

I and me which was once one, on the long run is no longer one, as I have been able to be a witness and watch from outside the shell. Not that, I have become an anchorite or a victim of MPD (multiple personality disorder). But, I have been indulging too much in aloneness and solitude. When I and me are too involved in a conversation and someone joins the conversation, it continues only when the person who joined substitutes the Me of me. How could it be endured, if it is otherwise? It will only be a cork which prevents the conversation sinking into the depth. Sometimes there are too many depths in these conversations. However, to be a little sociable or atleast agreeable to the society, there is much longing for a friend to make him/her as a substitute. This longing for a friend sometimes turns into a betrayal.

Mark Antrobus, has been a perfect substitute when it comes to company. I think, he is more than a substitute. My I and Me disappears in his company as it becomes a party of his conversation. In his presence, a day disappears into a millisecond and time exists not. Last month, Elango, a friend of Mark called me to tell that Mark is in Chennai for a day and gave the phone number of the hotel where he was staying. The next moment, I was knocking his door. There was no response. Then I dialled the hotel number and the call was transferred to the room. After a few rings, he picked up and immediately opened the door. A beaming smile and a hug of radiance and warmth was enough to take me in. He said, “Shiva, you have just proved the existence of ether. Moments before you called, may be as you were calling, I was just meditating and was feeling that you had entered my room and watching me meditating. And there comes a call and you are here!” The conversation continued on and on and on……

It was time for lunch. When I suggested that we should go out for lunch, he said that he has stopped eating rice, wheat or any form of carbohydrate and offered some oranges he had for lunch. I insisted that we go out for lunch where we can have his kind of food. We went to aiwo, a chain of restaurant that boasts itself as offering the food for life. As regular visitor, I always get some extra care from Napoleon, the waiter who always stares at me if I ask for chilled water, a forbidden as it reduced the metabolism rate. We thoroughly enjoyed the conveyer meal which consisted mainly of pulses, vegetables, soya and all that is health. Perfectly in sync with food combining that Mark propounds. Thanks to my friend Shankar for introducing me to aiwo.

Then we went around the city looking for some coconut buttons and it was funny to see the shop keepers attempting to speak in broken English while Mark speaking to them in fluent tamil. The day just went by and it was time to part.

Mark invited me for Grace’s (his mom) Centenary Birthday celebrations scheduled on the 23rd March 2008 at The Kodai Club. Though I said, I will make it, relocation again is the excuse for not having been in Kodaikanal to pay my respects and be blessed by Grace. I’m sure she will have many more healthy years ahead and continue doing the great things she has always been doing.

Happy Centenary Birthday Wishes Mom!

I know Mark was intending to write something about himself, may be an autobiography for a long time. Now that, the occasion has come. He has just started writing and hosted the website. If you want to know, what is like being the Dionysus Junior, a wandering ascetic hedonist, an autodidact and a polymath, read Mark Antrobus at http://www.dionysusjunior.com/

A trip to Bloomington

Though I was not able to snatch some time to visit my friend during my last visit, I made it this time on this long weekend, Monday being Martin Luther King’s Birthday. I saw people wonder having a civil rights leader’s birthday as holiday while there is no holiday for George Washington’s Birthday or Abraham Lincoln’s Birthday. Anyway, this is for the politicians and the vote banks to worry about.

I had to dodge many bullets and had to leave the office early on Friday for the fear of being caught in project meetings or activities that might surprisingly pop-up. I joined Satish on the 3 hour drive from Palatine to Bloomington. Sita, Satish’s friend had feast of aromatic tomato rasam and hot chilly shrimp fry ready for us when we arrived at 8:30 PM. Then my friend picked me up an hour later.

Saturday morning was mostly spent on playing with Peggy, who is 7 years old and Sahana, 3 years old. They became friends instantly and were teaching me various games line UNO Cards, Trade, Hide and Seek etc.


The only technique to become a natural friend of kids is to be natural.

- Pay attention
- Make sure they know you are paying attention
- Become a kid and respond as if you are of their age – bridge the gap.
- Learn and do what they teach
- Play the game their way, even if it's wrong. All that they are interested in is “My Turn to throw the dice” “Your turn to throw the dice” “I have won” “You have won” etc
- Play aggressively and genuinely
- Don’t excel, but make them excel in the game
- Acknowledge their victory and greet them

Afternoon we went to a house for a class on Vedic chanting. The class started with the chanting in praise of Lord Ganesh followed by the prayers for Dakshinamoorthi, Shiva, Vishnu, Rama, Krishna, Hanuman, Saraswathi, Lakshmi, Durga and Muruga. There were 5 kids attending the class and the master was dumbfounded by the flurry of questions shot at him.

Some interesting questions were

- Why Ganesh has an elephant face?
- If his real face was replaced by an elephant’s head, what happened to the elephant? Did they kill the elephant?
- What does each of the God offer?
- If Lakshmi can give wealth, will she give me lots of gold?

Though the purpose of the class was to make them pronounce complex Sanskrit words and to reap the benefits of the pranic breathing through the chanting of words, their incessant questions prolonged the class and questioned the patience of the master and the parents.

Evening we went around Bloomington shopping, picked some movies and slept after watching 2 movies.



Sunday was again spent on more games and TV. I was fascinated to watch Walt Disney’s Cindrella Part 3 and Ice Age Part 2. Peggy and Sahana were told that, I will be leaving the next day morning. I was looking through the photographs of the various stages of their newly built house and the house warming ceremony in the upstairs. It was fascinating to see how quickly the house was built. The foundation and the flooring were the only aspects in which concrete had been used. Everything was in readily available boards of wood and the structural design has given the strength to withstand any stress. My friend has given enough thoughts to make it more Indian than the usual bland American interior design.


Peggy quietly sneaked into the room and handed me a piece of paper with a sketch of Olive leaves he has drawn, followed by Sahana handing me a piece of paper with a crayon sketch and told me that it’s their gift. I was elated and blissful for they have taken me to my childhood days.

Trot Trot the Baby Goes

Finally, it was Vallimanavalan who found one of the lost poems. Though, it is already in a comment on my previous posting The Lost Poems, I'm posting it, in order for everyone to read and enjoy this sweet poem. I understand this as a poem written by Mary F Butts [1890-1937]. Her poetry seems to be of immediate access to the sacred, and the masks of the sacred. She goes directly to the subject , she wastes no time. The body of the poem becomes filled with things, with boxes, with screens, with feathers, with balls, with cups, the details of the personal highly charged and engaged, every word seems to be a translation of reality.

TROT, TROT!

Every evening Baby goes

Trot, trot, to town,

Across the river, through the fields,

Up hill and down.

Trot, trot, the Baby goes,

Up hill and down,

To buy a feather for her hat,

To buy a woolen gown.


Trot, trot, the Baby goes;

The birds fly down, alack!

"You cannot have our feathers, dear,"

They say, "so please trot back."


Trot, trot, the Baby goes;

The lambs come bleating near.

"You cannot have our wool," they say,

"But we are sorry, dear."

Trot, trot, the Baby goes,

Trot, trot, to town;

She buys a red rose for her hat,

She buys a cotton gown.

I am still searching for "My House is Red".

Mark Antrobus

First meeting

Though it was a hills station, the summer of Kodaikanal in the recent past has been as hot as Madurai. I was standing under the shade of the a lone wattle tree watching the giant road-roller giving its final touch on the newly laid road surface on the Kodai – Ghat road KM 48/6. A green ambassador, must be a 1960 model, slowed down the near the parapet across the road and a lean foreigner unmounted the driver’s seat and I was surprise to see him walking towards me. He must be at least 40 years of age, but the thing that caught my eyes most was the three stripes of vibhuti (lines of ashes) and vermilion mark on his forehead. With his blond hair shining in the simmering sun, his mustache and beard flowing through his face, his eyes settled in a state of serenity, he looked much like a sage. He introduced him self as Mark Antrobus, an active member of CPCK (Consumer Protection Council of Kodaikanal) and the PHCC (Palani Hills Conservation Council). He appreciated me for having delivered a quality work in laying this road and a couple of other stretches on the Lake Round Road I had executed recently. I was elated, as no one, even the local people have never cared to really motivate me for providing quality roads in spite of the corrupt system.

At the KMU

The next time I met him was at the Kodai Missionary Union (KMU) Library that I visited on Saturdays to browse through the huge collection of books and to pick a book that would be my companion during my travel in the following week. The library was meant for people with missionary connections and I am grateful to Mr. Watson, a former librarian of the Kodai International School who introduced me to the library. Coming back to Mark, we made our coffee and Mark was asking me suggestions on the initiatives to be taken through the CPCK and PHCC to ensure quality roads in Kodaikanal. I was least interested, as these are the few hours I snatch to get rid of the road rollers, heat masters, mini-mix plants and the other road stuffs. However, I gave him a few suggestions, just to be courteous and ended the conversation. He invited me to his house as wanted to introduce me to his mom.

At his Cottage

His house was situated on a hill 2 furlongs from the load road leading to Prakasapuram and the grass path leading from the road to his house had a fencing of Hydrangea (known among locals as Idly poo, for it is shaped like the south indian dish Idly) on the valley side and a retaining wall adorned with the trailing creepers and climbers on the hill-side. It was a beautiful cottage and the calling bell was answered by Mark himself. He offered a warm welcome in the Tamil way (Vanakkam) and ushered me into the living room where he introduced me to his mom Mrs.Grace, who is turning 92 the following week. He excused himself to complete his morning prayers leaving me with his mom. I could hear him reciting Maniye Maniyin oliye, Olirum ani punaindha …… verses from Abirami Anthadhi. His Tamil pronunciation was as perfect as MNSK, our Tamil pundit in Sainik. Mrs. Grace playing with the cat on her lap, was very happy to have found a companion to talk and started sharing her experiences as a war correspondent with Reuters during the WW II. While she was me telling that she had named her cat as Pompon, a submarine she had seen in the WW II, Mark arrived with a towel around his bare body. He took me around the house and finally we landed in the Kitchen. He asked, if I would like to have a tea and I nodded yes with a big smile thinking that he would be procuring fresh tea leaves from Darjeeling or Munnar through his missionary contacts.

Herbal Tea

He lighted the stove and placed a vessel with 2 glasses of water in it. He opened the windows and plucked a couple of Hibiscus and Chrysanthemum flowers, a bunches of Mint, Coriander and Tulsi leaves from the pots on the Window sill. Then took a tray of containers and added dried Lime-grass, Fennel, Vettiver and Rosemary. Then he added 2 teaspoons of Palm-sugar, Honey and finally squeezed a few drops of lime juice on the decoction. Though I sipped it with apprehension, the aroma of the drink rushed through my senses and I felt a refreshed breath. In a week’s time, I stopped drinking Coffee and Tea and switched to Mark’s herbal drink after collecting all the ingredients from various sources. In a few months my frequent nose block was gone completely and I also my weight reduced significantly.

The Farm House

My visits continued and on a Thursday, he called and invited me to his house on the following Sunday, to accompany him on a picnic to the farm house he is constructing, where would be spending the later part of his life. On the scheduled Sunday, along with Mark and Mrs. Grace, I started the trip. Near the Bonded Labor shed on the Kodai Palani Ghat road, he took a left turn and headed on the Ganaesapuram Road. After 8 KMs, he parked the car near a group of locals with a palanquin made of a bamboo chair tied on a reaper on its two sides. The men carried his Mom on the palanquin while Mark and I followed them through the foot-path. It would have been at least 6 KMs when we reached a grove of lemon trees (Got reminded of the beautiful Lemon Tree song by Fool’s Garden).

The scent of the ripe lemon mixed with the strong smell of mud was rejuvenating. Through the grove, I saw a two storey house built in random rubble masonry. As we reached the cottage, the group led Mrs.Grace into the house, while we sat on the verandah that ran along the walls with its heavy stone pillars. Except for the occasional cooing of the birds and humming of the rolling stream, there was only silence. I felt more relaxed than ever after the 6 KM walk through the jungle and I wanted to remain there forever.

I noticed that there was something unique with the mortar binding the walls. Mark told me that he started building this house a year ago and would take another year to complete. The house was built with granite rubble stones collected from the vicinity and the mortar used for binding the stones is a mixture of red gravel, lime stones, sand and jaggery. He has not used cement or any of a artificial material in building this house. The windows and doors were made by reusing the old windows and doors as he is strongly against felling of trees in the name of development. The floor was laid with terracotta tiles and the roof was a simple truss like structure covered by Mangalore Tiles. The wide bath room was tiled beautifully with small pieces of broken tiles of varying colors that he collected from the debris of the bath rooms of his shenbaganur house and he personally laid it creating a piece of art. There was a solar heater and an array of solar panels to supply electricity to the house and the water got collected in a tank on the roof by through gravity from the water fall at the back yard. I busied myself engrossed in every minute details of the house and Mark went to the kitchen to prepare our lunch.

The lunch was a salad of Knol-Khol, Turnip and leeks, red rice porridge, boiled legumes and a salad of peach dipped in honey as dessert. After the lunch, I stretched on a slanting rock below the water fall with my legs hanging through the streaming water. It was almost 4’0 clock when Mark announced that we should leave else, it would be too dark to locate the foot path.

The disconnect

The last time I visited Mark was to wish Mrs.Grace on her 94^th birthday and after I left Kodai, I rarely thought about them. Few years before, when I was going through Fit for Life by Harvey and Marilyn Diamond, a book presented by Mark, I got reminded of Mark and I called him. Mark was happy to hear from me and his mom appreciated me on my thoughtfulness. I invited him to our home if he happens to visit Chennai and he told me there was no reason for him to leave Kodai. Moreover, he told that his farm house is in the verge of completion he is making arrangements for settling there very soon and wished I should come there for a stay. I thanked him and when I hung the phone, I felt a sense of heaviness growing on my heart for having left such a beautiful people and place. But I know, life should go on as is. Last year, I called to wish Mrs.Grace on her birthday, only to hear the voice on the other side saying “The number you have dialed no longer exists”. I realized that he would have settled in his farm house far from any form of communication. Probably, I will visit his farm house during my next visit to Kodaikanal and till then, my mind has enough stupidities to be occupied with.

Mani C Markose

It was in my 9th class that I met Mani C Markose, a little 6th class guy who had the guts to walk in front of us when we were standing in the mess. I wouldn’t have cared if he had been from some other house. But his T-shirt revealed that he is from Bharathi House, for which I was the House Captain. I turned pale with anger and shame, when my batch mates stared at me. I didn’t react, as I didn’t want to make scene in the mess, where the whole school, including my seniors has gathered for the evening Roll Call, instead made quick plans to deal with the guy during the House Roll call, where I will have complete authority.

As usual, the house Roll Call started at 9:00 PM and when it was finished, I asked him to meet me in my room. The house master KRMK asked if there is a specific reason, and I told him that he deserves a punishment for his misbehavior in the mess. He asked me not to man-handle(beat) him, as it is becoming an issue during the Parent’s meet and I agreed.

I went to my room and washed and changed. There was a knock at the door, accompanied by a cry, “Please, may I come in man?.”

I said with a stern voice knowing that it would be culprit, “Come in.”

I was shooting many questions about his misconduct, about himself, about his family and he was answering everything with a pleasing smile. At the back of the mind, something kept saying that, this guy will be a friend for ever and somehow, I felt that he should be treated so, though it is not a custom for an Amravian to treat a junior as a friend. I order to keep a balance, I decided that he will be punished, but at the same time, he will remain a friend. I delegated a few duties as a form of punishment and he will perform them for me, so that he will be a friend.

You will bring tea for me in the mess
You will carry my books (envisioning to study a couple of text books in the room, which never materialized) from the school to house and back

The next day, my friends were proud of me, seeing the guy carrying my books and offering tea for me. This went on for 2 years and by then we were almost friends that, I visited his house and he visited mine. Finally, he ended up writing all my practical records, when I was in 12th class.

We were in constant touch even after I left the school, and after he left the school, though we were poles apart with respect to the career we have chosen.

It was a happy moment for me, when he visited our house yesterday and I was astonished by the kind of love and respect he had for me in the same way I have for him. Apart from the gifts for my son and a bottle of Smirnoff for me, he shared with me some beautiful snaps of Andaman, so that I will fulfill his long pending invitation. I don't think I will be able to make it before he is posted to the next station! OK, let me post some of those beautiful snaps...........

This is he!